I need to eliminate snacking from my fucking diet. I CANNOT STAND TO HAVE THIS EXTRA WEIGHT ON ME.
You may not shoot down my proclamations of weight gain. You don't know. You haven't noticed the reappearance of the muffin-top, or the extra layers I've been wearing.
But I have!
I COULD BE FIVE MONTHS PREGNANT AND I COULD BE HIDING IT FROM ALL OF YOU.
But I'm not, so it's cool.
Oh well, not a big deal. There's nothing permanent about weight gain.
Have you ever kissed someone 17 or older?
No, I prefer the fourteen and younger crowd.
Is your boyfriend or girlfriend a pain in the butt?
I'm going to assume this is a reference to anal sex and say yes, all the time. Also, I have no boyfriend or girlfriend. Haha!
How many bathing suits do you own?
I think I gave my last one to the Salvation Army.
Do you like the color green?
All the time.
Last person to call you?
Er, I didn't answer.
Last person to text you?
Heather, actually.
What song are you listening to right now?
"Swans (Life After Death)" by Islands
Have you ever fallen into a mud puddle?
I really don't think so. I'm not that unfortunate!
Do you like Winter?
Sometimes. When it's snowing, that's a definite yes. When looking at the bleak landscape lacking grass and leafless trees, absolutely not. And sometimes the cold chill is a nice reminder of the fact that I'm alive. Other times, it's miserable. So it could go either way.
Does your screen name have numbers in it?
No, but it has x's so I'm still a faggot.
Are you in a band?
I'm a back-up dancer.
Who's number 1 on your top friends?
Tobias Funke.
What are you most scared of?
Being rejected. It's not loneliness anymore.
What's your favorite non alcoholic beverage?
Coffee/tea/water.
Do you listen to rap?
Very infrequently.
Do you regret anything?
Fuck yes I do. You have to be a douche of sorts to not have any regrets. There's no fucking way everything that's ever happened has been a "learning experience." Some shit just doesn't need to happen. Why am I cursing like a sailor?
Do you like anyone?
I like a lot of people. YES I ANSWERED THAT QUESTION AMBIGUOUSLY.
Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Probably.
Do you have an addiction?
Eh, not completely.
Favorite swear word?
No.
How many pillows do you sleep with?
I generally make do with one. But lately I've had this badass nest of like four pillows in my bed and it's excessively comfortable.
Do you like hugs?
Only from strange, older men that hold on for a little too long.
Plans for Friday?
I don't plan that much ahead. Yesterday was lovely, though.
Been embarrassed in public?
I'm a walking embarrassment.
Are you confused about anything right now?
No not rly.
Three days from now will you be a in relationship?
Only with my lord and savior. LOL!
What's your ex up to?
"Ex" what? Ex-family pet, perhaps? It's dead. Its corpse probably hasn't even decayed yet. Or maybe it's been crushed. Wtfmorbid!
Do you like what you see in the mirror?
Currently, hell no. I look like I crawled out of a sewer in the '80s.
Do you like your first name?
Indifferent.
What are your initials?
FS.
What's one thing you've learned this year?
Everything and nothing. Seriously.
Do you get along with the parents?
Sure? Sort of? I guess? I don't know?
Favorite smell?
I like some people's preferred perfumes. And whatever that rain smell is. And honeysuckle and jasmine but mostly when someone that I'm related to grew it. And then certain smells that I can't remember but make me remember being a tiny tot are comforting. And, yeah...
Last person you called?
My mom.
What's the last thing you ate?
Cereal.
Who was the last person to pick you up from somewhere?
Sammmmmmmmmmmm.
Do you have any siblings?
CHOMPERRRR!
Last person you kissed?
Ahem.
Who were you last in a car with?
SAMMMMMMMMMM.
What is your most fond childhood memory?
My childhood's kind of blurry.
Okay, so what you're telling me is that you will have a baby in four months. And what I'm telling you is that you have to name him Heather. 
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